Two a penny

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OPINION:
The official website of the mayor of Wanganui is a fascinating monument to a man who simply cannot get enough of himself. It is a site absolutely awash in self-love.

Visitors to the cosily titled mayormichael. .co. Oh, and there’s some stuff about Wanganui, too. The site’s latest thrilling additions are magazine photos of Michael Laws’ family dating back to 2003 – just in case any of us neglected to cut them out at the time of publication – but there are also shots of his kids’ birthday parties, updates on the state of his relationship with his partner, and photos of Laws that stretch back to boyhood.

If there is any glimmer of a redeeming feature in this exercise in narcissism, it is that Mr Laws appears to have almost as soft a spot for children as he has for himself.

All of which makes it a surprise to see the level of contempt with which he treated a group of Otaki children who had the temerity to write to him last month. Mr Laws clearly adores his own kids, and has written in the past about the evils of child abuse.

In response, he wrote the girls a letter suggesting their teacher be sacked, urging them to control their anger, and saying he wouldn’t take their views seriously unless they first looked at the rate of child abuse and murder within Maori society.

The seven students of Otaki School’s kura kaupapa unit, aged from 11 to 13, wrote to Mr Laws in Maori to say what they thought about the controversy over whether Wanganui should have an “h” in its name. But here’s the thing: whatever.

There has since been much debate about whether the Maori word used by all seven students in their letters and translated by Mr Laws’ team as “anger” should instead have been “frustration”. It shouldn’t be news to Mr Laws, father of many, that pre-teen girls are stroppy, and that 12-year-olds have yet to learn the social bullshit that enables us to express our opinions in a detached manner. It shouldn’t be news to Mr Laws, father of many, that pre-teen girls are stroppy, and that 12-year-olds have yet to learn the social bullshit that enables us to express our opinions in a detached manner. Children of their age should, he said, care only about Harry Potter.

Firstly, this champion of direct democracy argued that “it’s wrong for kids to be angry about something inanimate”.

AN ARGUMENT this ludicrous doesn’t fly for long, so Mr Laws then argued that their teacher had put them up to it. In others words, it’s not just that their views are wrong; they shouldn’t be allowed to have views. As any parent knows, it’s impossible to convince a 12-year-old girl to turn her music down if she doesn’t want to. Who is this classroom Svengali? Again, I come back to the legendary stroppiness of pre-teen girls.

. The thought of a teacher being able to persuade seven of them to write letters against their will is simply inconceivable, unless electric cattle prods were involved